Why Family responsibilities become stressful at times ?

I see lots of my friends & colleagues , earlier they were fun -loving friends .. now i see them always cribbing "uff, my little one is naughty", "ayo.. its long time since me and my hubby had a simple chat", " oops, the house is a mess always", "omg, office and home both are stressful", "hubby always escapes from responsibilities"... 

Infact I have sort of crossed those cribbing stages ... how ? i never did intentionally to overcome those days.. but few best practices I can recall, which now helps us manage responsibilities without stress !

1. Take atleast 1 hour for you ! ONLY you ! Maybe a book, music time / dance / swimming / art class... Ensure, you maintain the hobby outside house so that the one hour, you are totally spending for you. So your mind remembers never to complain " I am sacrificing my entire life for family" 

2. Talk to your child about office- friends, ask him / her about school incidents, dad also to contribute this chit chat time.. this will give a great feeling that not just you had a hectic day, but even a 3 yr old not getting a chance to answer mam's question first is a stress for the child.. you feel better when you share simple stuffs, but make sure you dont pass on negative energy.. 

3. Make sure, you show enough importance to your spouse like cooking his fav, complimenting as well.. Most women forget this part, thinking he is the most matured person and he loves when you take care of children ALWAYS.. NOT TRUE AT ALL... (applies to all) esp Indian men are brought up the way that they have to maintain "Head of the family" image, so they do not tell their little expectations to the lady of their love.  We have to maintain a perfect balance between lover - wife - mom !!

4. Give kids - dad special time, where you are not there, I have seen families where dad is like a chief guest to his teenage kids who feel "What to do" when mom is not around at home and dad is busy with laptop.. from early days, make dad take the child for a ride / a walk / a video game.. ( when I am away for a day, my son dwells only on plain dosa as my hubby knows to make only dosa, but its OK, one day without vegetables is sad but dad and son time creates a special bonding when MOM don't apply rules )

5. Give children a break away from home.. like grandparents home, cousins place or at least his friend's place for a while... make sure it is safe but let your child learn to be independent for 2 to 3 days (once in 6 months) and make sure, you either focus on your career like 24 hours working, show all your passion without limits at office / you take a vacation with your spouse those 2 days.. its an experience guys... you will realise that your child is a separate individual who has his / her choice and fun in granny's place !!! 

6. Never disturb your husband by calling him frequently when he is away from home to a different place for work ! C'mon !!! Let him have a nice break ! Thou we are better halves, we should respect and give privacy to the other half's personal space :-) Trust me ladies.. when you do not disturb them , they get into AUTO - CONTROL mode by default :)

7. Understand and accept the fact that your child is growing. One fine day, I should take the risk of sending my child alone to play area / to his friend's house. I should give him paint and brush , and leave him free to explore his creativity than scared of the walls. 

8. Teach good habits to your child : We think children do not understand most of the things, but they are smarter, they also know the techniques how to get things done from you... they know that smile works out for mom, please works out with dad, tears work out in worst case.. So the challenge is "UPGRADE YOURSELF" be smart ! Show your child that you are a smart mom ... Strict when you have to be strict ! Loving Angel as always.. Kids understand !!!

Moral : "When you give each person in family enough private space and happy breaks including YOU, responsibilities are always lovely.. never a stress ! When we create too many rules around us, then its tough to follow :-D "

Happy Parenting in a Happy Family folks :-)

Dhaksh mesmerising moments (MM)

This blog is about the interesting cute intelligent funny special moments created by my little son Krish Dhakshin :-)

Dhaksh : "Amma, is cut a bad word ? "
Me :          "No dear, y?
Dhaksh : "Amma, is head , hand a bad word ?"
Me :          "No dear, who told u ?"
Dhaksh : "Then when someone says 'i will cut ur head , hand', why is it bad ? Cut, head, hand, nothing is a bad word rit ? "

Me :            "!!!!!!!!!! "

Me : "dear, what do u like about amma ? "
Dhaksh : "now you will give me your phone to play right , I like that so much ma " ;-)
Me : ??!!!!!?? :-)

Dad keeps working very busy in laptop
3 yrs old Dhaksh says "dad, I want ur laptop"
Dad :" appa has so much work dear"
Dhaksh :" appa, pls.. I also have so much work in your laptop,  want to watch many rhymes "
Dad bursting into laughter :-)

Our life, our love, our everything, the little us

1. Did I give life to u ?
Each time
When the world becomes dark
When my happiness fades away
When my heart breaks into pieces
When I fall on feet of death and sorrow
Your smile glorifies my life
Your little  touch resumes my smiles back
Your innocent looks gives me positive energy
When you call me 'amma' I am reborn with happiness again !
You give me life each such time...

My dear son....

2.  The kick of love gave me the pride that wife is best relationship on earth
The little kick you gave inside my tummy broke my pride saying "motherhood" is the best in the universe :-)

3.Just like sun rays melts the dew drops

Ur smile rays melts my sorrows my dear son :-)

4. What ever educational qualification I acquire
How much ever books I read
When you tell me a new rhyme you learnt in school
I sit before u as a curious innocent student again :-)
My dear son !!!

Crazy love, crazy lover

1. My poems are crazy on love
Just like me crazy on u

Kaadhal meedhu paiyamana kavidhaigal
Unmeedhu paithiyamana ennai pola ;-)

2. If a soother is to calm down a baby crying for mommy,
What do I call these songs which soothes my heart which misses u when u r in office ;-)

3. Thanks to those petty fights, which invited the compromise hugs

4. What is the magic ? My choice of song keeps changing while the hero of each song remains the same you ?!!

Idhu enna mayamo ?
Naan virumbum paadalgal maarinalum, paadal ninaivil thondrum naayagan adhe neeeyaga than irukirai ;-)

5. When I walk around a crowded ground, my feet can feel your footprints alone :-)

Drunken Pear

Ingredients :
1.pear fruit, skin peeled but not sliced
2. Red wine
3. Sugar

Method :
STEP 1 - Heat red wine in a deep pan, after a minute,  add adequate sugar, double times of ur tea - sugar ratio
STEP 2 - after 5 mins, when it boils wuth bubbles, drop the pear slowly into the wine sugar syrup and close with a lid, reduce flame to medium
STEP 3 - once in 3 minutes, turn the pear with spoon into all directions so that it is cooked equally at all sides, repeat this for 10 mins
STEP 4 - insert a spoon to slice the boiled pear, if it goes smooth and also red wine is thicker , then switch off the stove and close the lid.
STEP 5 - you can have it hot with vanilla ice cream or if u place the drunken pear in fridge to chill, that would also be a good one...

Check it out ;-)

Loving you and falling in love with you !!

When you go to a shop to buy flowers for your wife

, its loving her !
When you see the flowers 

And your wife's thoughts arrest your mind and heart

Tempting you to buy those flowers for her

, its falling in love with her !!!

Poochendu vanga kadhaludan ne kadaiku chelumpodhu 

avalai kadhalikirai!

Avasara velaiyaga kadaiku pogum podhu, 

andha poochendai paarthu 

aval gnabagam un manadhai siraiyitu, 

ne poochendu vanga chelumpodhu 

kaadhalil vilugirai !!!

Stars and Sky :-)

It was 11 pm, I went to the terrace to enjoy nature and get some fresh air. I noticed that there were no stars, not a single star.. My eyes were curious and started searching for the twinkle star, for the shining stars, for the tiny star.. I kept searching , kept waiting,  my eyes were tired and my clock finished 5 rounds of tick tock.

It was almost dawn when I was mesmerized by the stunning beauty of the wide sky, The clear beautiful standard sky, wow ! What a moment it was.. I was immersed into the beauty of nature. Oh, thats when I realised, the reason I came to terrace was to enjoy nature. Searching for the stars that never came that day, I missed to enjoy the dark beauty of lovely blue sky.

Very often this happens in life too, waiting or searching for star moments that might or might not come, we miss to treasure the sweet and simple moments which are with us forever. "Live every moment"